CLUMSYPANDA is tired..
so damn tired..
so freaking tired..
But, I still want the money.. a car.. my dream house..my holiday..
And, I am not the person who can really sit at home..
U see, I had been working in the same company ever since I graduated from my marketing course and so called Professional Marketer, but, I ended up doing office work. A 8:30 am to 5:00 pm work. And, on every Saturday half day. (and, friends got a shock when I told them I am still working on Saturday. =______=”)
Initially, I like my job. Nice people. Nice work. Nice travelling. And, I had the confident that mount up high and told myself.. geez.. this is what I wanted to do till 55 years old. My enthusiastic rocketed high.. I felt good. I even went to work even when I was sicked half dead and recently found out that I was famous for being in office when sick.. wth..
So many things happened, and I agreed much with what Aud wrote~ ”Work just makes me feel stupid sometimes I think I forget how amazing I am …” .. I lost my most important point of life.. and I am tired.
Many times, I very much wanted to tell the company, I wanted to have a 1 or 2 months off. So that I can collect back all the lost pieces in my life and recharge again my life. Many times, I wanted to type the letter and resign and go.. waiting for God to show me the way.
I told my colleague that I wanted to have 2 months off.. And, he said “You think the company belongs to you ar?”.. and, I replied “Ya. I think the company belongs to me. If I don’t feel like it. I shut it down and carry on my business else where (look for another job)” .. furthermore what is work for if you no longer find the motivation to go on..
Doesnt mean I don’t like my job.I love it. Indeed I wish to work long enough. I had the bittersweet memory here. I met up with amazing people. I met up with people who really make me laugh. I met up with people who make me cry as well. getting all sort of surprises from colleagues just cheer up my days. These were all the memory I had which I find it hard to erase. I am going to miss it badly.
And, with another news I got yesterday.. clumsypanda declared myself… DEFEATED..
Wonder how long will it take for me to stand up again.
Or, I really need to call it QUIT!!